The department that turned firing into a growth opportunity.
The process of bringing an international expatriate employee back to their home country office. Often involves culture shock in reverse.
A service provided to laid-off employees to help find new jobs, often described as generous while amounting to mostly LinkedIn profile coaching.
The power to tell people what to do and actually have them listen—the holy grail of leadership. Also: a direct order that questions are not welcome to ask about.
An employee who can do multiple things adequately, borrowed from tech terminology. Essentially, your one-person army before you hire a proper team.
The practice of not assigning individual desks, forcing employees to scramble daily for a workspace. It's saving money at the cost of sanity.
What happens when your job description outlives your usefulness—you become the corporate equivalent of a deleted scene. In HR speak, this means getting let go because the company decided it doesn't need your role anymore, or simply being excessively repetitive.
When another company hires your good employees away. Considered unethical unless your company does it.
A state of dissatisfaction that drives change; the opposite of complacency. When people are discontented, they're motivated to demand better conditions, though management usually wishes they'd just keep quiet.
A glorious pause in work where you briefly escape your desk, inbox, or responsibilities—or a physical rupture in something, depending on whether you're refreshed or clumsy.
Society for Human Resource Management—the professional organization that sets standards for HR and makes sure everyone knows the acronym.
Anonymous employee testimonies about company culture, used by HR to understand why they can't hire anyone. They rarely like what they find.
Performance-based pay intended to motivate employees. Studies show it actually causes anxiety and internal competition instead.
Equity compensation that vests over time, converting hypothetical wealth into actual shares on a schedule designed to retain talent who can't afford to leave.
An employee management has decided will be the next leader, often based on charisma rather than actual competence.
A goal-setting framework where employees set ambitious targets they'll miss by 30% and pretend it's motivational.
A website where employees anonymously trash-talk their employers and ruin the company's reputation before HR can intervene.
Management's desperate attempt to get remote workers back to the office for 'collaboration' and 'culture.'
The period when an employee is fully paid but has no assigned project, secretly the best part of consulting life.
A defined-contribution retirement savings plan sponsored by employers in the U.S., named after the IRS tax code section. The primary vehicle Americans use to pretend they're saving adequately for retirement while knowing they aren't.
A legal agreement preventing employees from working for competitors after leaving. Controversial because it often favors the employer.
The HR function responsible for managing the relationship between employer and employees, or as employees call it, the complaint department.
Scientific evaluation using tests to measure personality, intelligence, or job fit; supposedly objective but often validates whatever bias you already had.
An informal HR approach to quickly checking in with someone or tapping them for information or work.
A company's ability to adapt quickly to change; loudly proclaimed in mission statements while organizational structures remain ossified.