Where cozy means tiny and charming means needs work.
The annual reminder from your local government that you don't really own your home -- you're just renting it from the county with extra steps. Miss a payment and find out who the real landlord is.
A letter from a bank saying they'll probably lend you money, assuming nothing in your life changes between now and closing. It's a financial pinky promise that expires faster than milk.
A property for sale that's kept secret from the general public, like a speakeasy for houses. Only the agent's inner circle gets to know about it, which is definitely not exclusionary at all.
A fancier way of saying "price" that makes real estate agents feel like they're doing economics instead of sales. It adds absolutely nothing to the conversation except an extra word and a sense of sophistication.
A valuation metric for multifamily properties calculated by dividing price by number of units, because apparently 'per unit' wasn't jargony enough. It's the real estate equivalent of price per ounce.
A surveyed map showing property boundaries, lots, streets, and easements in a subdivision, recorded with local authorities. The official drawing that proves your neighbor's fence is definitely on your lawn.
A rental fraud where scammers request post-dated checks for future rent, then cash them immediately or use the banking information for identity theft. It's why legitimate landlords now say 'no thanks' to your grandma's preferred payment method.
A type of zoning allowing flexible development within a defined area, mixing housing types, densities, and uses while preserving open space. PUDs let developers cluster buildings creatively instead of following rigid lot-by-lot rules.
A soil test measuring how quickly water drains, crucial for determining if a property can support a septic system. Dirt's resume for its ability to handle your wastewater.
Per Calendar Month—the rental industry's way of stating the bleeding obvious about monthly payments, because apparently 'monthly' wasn't clear enough. Commonly seen in real estate listings alongside other redundant acronyms designed to make basic concepts sound more professional. The 'ATM machine' of property jargon.
Upfront fees paid to the lender at closing to reduce your interest rate, where one point equals 1% of the loan amount. It's buying a discount on money you're borrowing—capitalism at its finest.
The apartment that sits on top of a building like a crown, usually inhabited by people who think elevators are for peasants. Originally just a shed attached to a building, it evolved into the ultimate flex in urban real estate—complete with panoramic views and price tags that require scientific notation. Because nothing says 'I've made it' like living where pigeons used to roost.
The original loan amount borrowed, excluding interest, or in agency relationships, the person represented by an agent. Context is everything, because confusing the two can make closing statements deeply confusing.
A fee charged for paying off a mortgage early, compensating lenders for lost interest income. It's the bank's way of punishing you for financial responsibility and denying them years of interest payments.
A final list of minor repairs or incomplete items that need addressing before closing on new construction. It's proof that even 'move-in ready' is aspirational.
The four horsemen of monthly housing payments: Principal, Interest, Taxes, and Insurance. It's the total amount you'll shell out each month to keep a roof over your head and the bank off your back.
The theoretical rental income from a vacant unit that's factored into pro forma projections but not actually being collected. It's the imaginary money that makes cap rates look better on paper than they are in reality.
The closing day arithmetic splitting property expenses and income between buyer and seller based on ownership periods. It's the financial equivalent of splitting a restaurant check by who ordered what.
A discrete unit of land that can be bought, sold, or taxed as a single entity—essentially real estate Legos that local governments use to organize property ownership. It's the official way of saying "this chunk of dirt is yours" with legal boundaries, documentation, and the inevitable property tax bill. Not to be confused with the thing Amazon drops on your doorstep.
The increased value created when adjacent properties are combined into a larger, more useful parcel. It's the financial proof that sometimes the whole really is worth more than the sum of its parts.
A euphemistic phrase suggesting the current owners maintain their property immaculately, or more cynically, that they've over-improved it beyond what the market will bear. Translation: someone really loves their home, possibly too much.
Additional rent paid by retail tenants based on a percentage of their gross sales above a threshold, common in shopping centers. It's the landlord's way of ensuring they profit from your business success while you bear all the risk.
A legal doctrine where you can actually gain ownership of property by possessing it openly and continuously for a statutory period, essentially rewarding squatting with a deed. Also known as adverse possession, this concept turns 'finders keepers' into actual law, provided you're bold enough to act like you own something for long enough. It's the legal system's way of saying 'use it or lose it' to absentee property owners.
The extra compensation an agent receives when representing both buyer and seller, also called double-ending. Twice the work or twice the conflict of interest, depending on who you ask.