Definition

Objectives and Key Results, a goal-setting framework that promises alignment and accountability but mostly delivers quarterly arguments about what counts as a key result. It's the corporate New Year's resolution system -- set ambitiously in January, forgotten by March.

Example Usage

"We spent two weeks setting OKRs. We spent zero weeks looking at them again until the end-of-quarter review, where we all pretended we remembered what they were." - A strategically forgetful employee

Related Terms

Advanced

Right-Sizing

A euphemism for layoffs that implies the company was the wrong size before, like a pair of pants that needs tailoring. The people being let go are apparently excess fabric. It sounds strategic instead of devastating, which is the whole point.

👥 Human Resources
Intermediate

DEI

Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion -- the corporate initiative that ranges from genuine organizational transformation to a single lunch-and-learn in February. The commitment level can usually be measured by whether DEI has its own budget or just a shared Google Drive folder.

👥 Human Resources
Intermediate

Termination

The clinical, robotic word for firing someone that makes it sound like deactivating a piece of equipment. HR uses it because saying "we ended a human's livelihood" doesn't fit neatly in a dropdown menu.

👥 Human Resources
Beginner

disputes

In HR land, the polite corporate term for 'people yelling at each other about who ate whose yogurt,' escalated to include formal grievances, arbitration, and occasionally lawyers. These disagreements can range from genuinely important issues like discrimination to Jerry insisting his cubicle is 2.3 inches smaller than Sarah's. Most companies have a 47-step dispute resolution process designed to make everyone too exhausted to continue fighting.

👥 Human Resources
Intermediate

quiet firing

The cowardly art of making someone's job so miserable they quit voluntarily, saving the company from having to actually fire them and pay severance. It's passive-aggressive management disguised as organizational restructuring, complete with removed responsibilities and excluded meeting invites.

👥 Human Resources
Advanced

adverse impact

When an employment practice disproportionately excludes a protected group, violating discrimination laws even if unintentional. The legal term for 'oops, your hiring process is accidentally racist.'

👥 Human Resources

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