retaining

Definition

The act of keeping employees from fleeing to competitors, usually achieved through a combination of competitive salaries, stock options, free snacks, and the vague promise of 'culture.' When used in legal contexts, it refers to paying someone a retainer so they'll actually return your calls. Both definitions involve spending money to prevent abandonment.

Example Usage

The company's retaining strategy consisted of pizza parties and threatening to exercise their non-compete clauses.

Source: Common business terminology

Related Terms

Beginner

employee

A person who trades their labor, expertise, and roughly 40 hours per week for a paycheck and the thrilling uncertainty of corporate restructuring. Unlike freelancers, they get benefits and PTO; unlike executives, they get neither stock options worth mentioning nor the luxury of failing upward. The organizational building block that HR refers to as 'headcount.'

👥 Human Resources

Intermediate

presenteeism

When employees show up to work but are unproductive due to illness, burnout, or other issues. The zombie state of being physically present while mentally checked out or too sick to function.

👥 Human Resources

Beginner

internship

A mutually beneficial arrangement where students gain "valuable experience" while companies gain valuable free (or underpaid) labor. Often the corporate equivalent of an audition, where bright-eyed candidates perform grunt work in exchange for LinkedIn bragging rights and the distant promise of actual employment. Despite the educational spin, it's basically a trial period where both parties determine if they can tolerate each other for 40+ hours a week.

👥 Human Resources

Beginner

attendance

The official record of who actually showed up versus who claimed their alarm didn't go off. A metric obsessively tracked by schools, HR departments, and managers who believe physical presence equals productivity. Poor attendance can lead to disciplinary action, while perfect attendance often earns you a certificate nobody really cares about.

👥 Human Resources

Beginner

Quiet Quitting

The revolutionary act of doing exactly what you're paid to do and absolutely nothing more. Somehow this basic employment concept needed a trendy name to scandalize LinkedIn thought leaders everywhere. Turns out "working your job description" needed a rebrand.

👥 Human Resources

Intermediate

reskilling

Training employees in entirely new skill sets to prepare them for different roles, usually because their current job is being automated or eliminated. It's the corporate way of saying 'your job is obsolete, but we like you enough to keep you around.'

👥 Human Resources

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