Resting

Definition

Letting cooked meat sit undisturbed after cooking so the juices redistribute throughout. It's the hardest part of cooking because it requires doing absolutely nothing while a perfect steak sits there taunting you. Most people fail this step because they are human and steak is delicious.

Example Usage

"The steak needs to rest for 10 minutes. I lasted 2 minutes and 37 seconds. The juices ran everywhere. I regret nothing and also everything."

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Umami

The fifth taste alongside sweet, salty, sour, and bitter -- often described as 'savory' or 'mouth-filling deliciousness.' It's the reason you can't stop eating parmesan cheese and mushrooms. Discovering umami is like finding out there's been a secret flavor channel you weren't subscribed to.

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Pittsburgh rare

A steak seared hard on the outside until charred but left practically raw inside. Legend says Pittsburgh steelworkers would cook steaks on blast furnace doors, creating this extreme contrast.

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cru

A French designation indicating a specific vineyard or group of vineyards recognized for superior quality and distinct characteristics, essentially wine's way of having a VIP section. This classification system ranks properties based on terroir, tradition, and prestige, with terms like 'Premier Cru' and 'Grand Cru' sending wine prices into the stratosphere. It's real estate rankings for grapes that somehow justify charging $300 for fermented juice.

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proof

Allowing yeast dough to rise before or after shaping, during which time the yeast ferments and creates gas bubbles. The period where you anxiously watch dough and wonder if your yeast is actually alive.

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panade

A paste of starch and liquid used to bind forcemeats and maintain their texture, preventing your pâté from turning into expensive cat food. The unsung hero that keeps delicate preparations from falling apart both literally and metaphorically.

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hydrocolloid

A substance that forms gels or thickens liquids when mixed with water, beloved by modernist chefs for creating foams, spheres, and textures that defy physics. The molecular magic that makes diners question reality.

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